Day 11: Shrinking Comfort Zone Day

Remember in kindergarten, when you just walked up to the first kid you saw and decided to be friends with them. There wasn't any need to "get to know them," you just simply became friends, no rigamarole necessary. Well, with the kids at Fiwagoh I felt like I was in kindergarten again. As soon as we met, I felt like we had been friends forever! We laughed, shared stories, and learned about one another's lives with not even the slightest hesitance. Isn't it so awesome to watch how God's great power dissolves any man-made boundaries we can create??

Keeping in mind the deep relationships we formed with the kids (even after only being with them for a day), you may be able to understand the heart-breaking nature of saying goodbye to them. We woke up fairly early on day 11, had worship with the kids one "last" time (yes, the last is in quotation marks because I'm putting into practice that fun English lesson about foreshadowing), and then began to say goodbye. It was a LONG process, not because of the 180 kids, but because we just couldn't bear to let go without numerous, numerous bear hugs distributed to our Fiwagoh kiddos. Finally, we were able to get our sobbing selves on the bus, and we pulled away for the "last" time [there goes that fancy foreshadowing again ;) ]

I still don't think my heart has recovered from the final goodbye...It's not something I can adequately describe in words; words like sad don't really seem to do it justice, more like gut-wrenching heartache. I miss them; desperately, desperately miss them. I'm confused because I feel like my time there was so short, but I don't know how/when/if I need to go back. The whole "waiting on the Lord" thing is definitely not easy for me to do.

After crying my eyes out on the bus for awhile, I finally pulled it together, somewhat. I cried out a silent prayer that God would restore my physical and emotional energy so that I would have enough left to show His love to the kids that we were going to visit. I had expected that we would just pull up to the church, run a VBS program, and then head to the hotel for some shut-eye, but God had some quite different plans; He answered, yet another time, my prayer that I would be taken out of my comfort zone.

Here is a little compare and contrast for you...just a small aside before you read it...I do, in fact, realize that some of the things I was uncomfortable with pale in comparison to reality many face on a day to day basis; I know that I'm spoiled rotten, and that many would kill to live the life that I have...all that said, I just wanted to give the honest truth about how God took me out of my comfort zone, and in order to do that I feel like you should see where I am coming from...

Ellie's Comfort Zone vs. Ellie's not-so-comfortable Zone

-The cushy padded toilet seat in my bathroom at home vs. a hole in the ground in a Kenyan outhouse

[Another side note, I actually had a legitimate fear of public restrooms when I was younger, so the whole slanted hole in the ground was not my particular favorite thing, but God totally showed me how spoiled rotten I am through this experience, so I'm thankful for it!]

-GPS(s) vs. Getting lost in the Kenyan mountains

-Driving on paved roads vs. Driving in a mud slide

-Unquestioned safety vs. Potentially dangerous situations

[22 women + 48 bags on the top of a bus + interested city dwellers= not the best situation]

If you have specific questions about the "going-ons" about our day 11 Kenyan adventure, I'd be happy to answer them via another avenue besides blog. Needless to say, we drove 6 hours to a church, stayed for 15 minutes because the rain was creating the "fun" mudslide I mentioned earlier, turned around after seeing our hotel, and drove another 6 hours back to Fiwagoh, because Pastor Benson graciously allowed us to stay another two nights there.

I learned on day 11 that God truly is our Divine Protector. His promises to never leave us or forsake us hold true ALL the time. Day 11 definitely further developed my trust in God and His sovereign control. I like to think that God allowed us to go back to Fiwagoh because He wasn't finished in using us there yet. Pastor Benson told us later that when he told the kids that we were coming back, they all began to cry tears of joy. In some of the letters the kids gave us they said that when they heard we were coming back, they felt as though Jesus had come back. We were soo lucky to have two more days to pour into these sweet children's lives. Also, Pastor Benson refused to allow us to pay for our lodging, so we saved a lot of money that we were supposed to spend on our hotel in a different city. With the money we saved, we were able to buy Fiwagoh some extra supplies they needed, as well as some fruit, which they rarely get. Day 11, as in any other day of our lives, God was good; so, so good!